Mom: Sofia, can you clean up your lunch mess? You left bacon grease in the frying pan.
Where’s my grease container?! Did somebody throw away my grease?
Mom: What grease?
Sofia: The grease in the freezer! I’ve been saving it.
Mom: Oh yeah. We probably threw it away. Your father and I cleaned out the freezer the other day.
Sofia: Aaagh! I was saving that!
Mom: What for?
Sofia: To make soap out of!
Mom: ………………………………….. Our freezer is small, Sofia. We don’t really have room for bacon grease to make soap out of.
Sofia: But it’ll go to waste otherwise!
Or maybe I’ll use it to pop some popcorn later.
Mom: WHAT?! You’re going to eat it? You’ll clog your arteries!
Sofia: But I don’t want to waste it . . .
Maybe I’ll deep-condition my hair with it. People use olive oil; why not bacon grease? It’s all-natural, right?